Great Conversations Break the Rules
Momma said, “Don’t interrupt.” Let people finish. Pause. Make space.
Master the habit of letting people finish before you speak. But the rules experts make up get in the way of great conversations.
6 Ways to Break the Rules and have Great Conversations
Break the good habit of letting people finish. Give yourself permission to interject.
Great conversations are a dance. Turn-taking is less important.
#1 Interject to Show Interest
Jumping in shows engagement. Try saying:
- “Wait—did you say…?”
- “Hold on, that seems important.”
- “Do you mean…?” (Stay aligned.)
#2 Circle Back to Preserve Value
Don’t let good ideas slip away. Use phrases like:
- “Before we go on, I’d like to go back to…”
- “That reminds me of something important.”
Ideas expire quickly. Share strong thoughts before they fade when they contribute to momentum.
#3 Get Nosey
“Tell me what you really think.”
“How did that affect you?”
“What do you really think about that?”
“What are you not saying?”
#4 Overshare a Little
“The same thing happened to me.”
“I’ve felt like that.” But don’t steal the conversation. Don’t assume you understand someone.
#5 Judge Gently
“You’re kidding.”
“I can’t believe it.”
#6 Have Fun Speaking the Truth
Exaggeration works when trust runs deep.
“You’re nuts.”
“Have you lost your mind?”
“I think you’re way off base.”
4 Undeniable Laws of Great Conversations
#1 Powerful conversations bounce. Interjections energize when done with curiosity.
#2 Follow the #1 improv rule: “Go with” when you jump in. Be willing to change your mind. Don’t hijack conversations.
#3 Many conversations are all business. When you’re the boss, great conversations are rare. Sometimes they are completely inappropriate.
#4 Location matters. Offices kill great conversations. Take a walk. Have coffee.
Which conversation rule would you love to break?
Which one would you never break?
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